Things Zines Have Taught Me
by Ninjalicious of Infiltration
Zine titles should consist of 1 to 4 random words that just
Its a good idea to start begging for submissions before
you begin work on your first issue, and continue to beg in each
All submissions should be published, otherwise youre
a good way to show apathy or be poetic is to always use lowercase
and avoid punctuation
Spelling and grammer arent important, its about the messige.
Not editing or profreading a zine make is more indie,
The main focus of a zine should be how much the editors
Editors should reprint everything they write (letters, diary
entries, homework) in their zine, or it will be wasted.
Each issue should begin with an editorial apologizing for
how late the issue is and explaining why none of the planned
features worked out.
Content a little dry? Try swearing.
Build controversy by attacking such difficult targets as Christianity,
censorship, McDonalds and the media.
Short of content? Print and photocopy the website of your choice.
When designing a zine, be sure to leave plenty of dark grey space.
The importance of margins is ov
Ironic clipart from the 50s is inherently funny and
Article titles should generally be written in the font Comic
Text written in a cool $249 alternative font from
Adobe Corporation (NYSE: ADBE) is more indie.
You can get fonts for your parents laser printer that print
as illegibly as an old typewriter.
Typewriters are more indie than computers. Records are more indie
than CDs. Bronze is more indie than iron.
Illegibility is a political statement. It also makes it harder
to pick apart bad arguments.
Anarchy is a political philosophy best summarized by scrawling
Each article in a punk zine must attempt to define the term punk
and explain whats wrong with the scene.
If someone makes money, and you dont like them, they should
be denounced as a sellout.
All zines must contain concert, record and zine reviews.
If you dont photocopy your concert tickets, people wont
believe you were there.
Blackened generic band pictures also improve credibility.
All zine publishers liked the current indie rock sensations before
they were trendy.
Dont worry about being irrelevant by interviewing bands
your audience has never heard of and will never hear of
band members usually have lots of interesting things to say.
In a band interview, the band must be asked if they prefer performing
on the road or in the studio.
Its also a good idea to reprint newspaper clippings and
things you find on the Internet, particularly wacky
Be sure to run several pages of ads for other zines so they'll
advertise your zine in their pages of zine ads. Through this
sort of networking, everyone can get copies of everyone else's
booklets of ads.
A zine ad should consist of the zine's name, address and a picture
or comic cut out of a magazine or newspaper. Build suspense by
saying nothing about the zine's contents.
Broad, cynical sarcasm such as this is usually a good substitute
for intelligent critique.
Copyright 1999 Ninjalicious.
This column originally appeared in Amusing Yourself to Death.
Posted with permission.
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